Exit, Pursued By a Bear
by Lord Raa
Summary: AU story where some people may decide that the only thing worse than a wild horse is a wild bear.
1. Part 1

Exit, Pursued By a Bear

By Lord Raa

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><p>Disclaim-me-do: Scotch eggs don't tessellate.<p>

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><p>Soun Tendo blinked in confusion at the black-furred bear that stood at the entrance to his home.<p>

"What the…" Sweat drops started to form on his brow as he started to realise just how much danger he could be in.

"Calm down, Tendo-kun," a bespectacled man said. "Stress isn't good for a man of your age."

"S-Saotome-kun?" Soun asked, turning his attention away from the bored looking bear.

"I am indeed, Tendo-kun. Now, if you'll invite us in, we can quickly avoid any unnecessary danger."

"U-unnecessary d-danger? T-there's a b-bear in my doorway! He'll eat my daughters!"

"No he won't, Tendo-kun. While I can appreciate your concern for this unusual situation, my ursine companion here is in fact my son, Ranma. I will explain as soon as we're inside," the human Saotome said.

"What's all the fuss, Daddy?" Nabiki Tendo asked, as she approached her father. "BEAR! Call the police!"

"There's no need for that, young lady. If you get us some hot water, everything will be explained."

"Y-yes, Nabiki… could you bring us some hot water," Soun asked.

"Bear!" the middle daughter repeated before running upstairs and locking the door to her room.

"It would appear that your family require some basic training on how to deal with large mammals," Genma commented. "I would be happy to provide this training."

"Training? What are you talking about, Saotome? You've brought a bear with you!"

"I have filled out the relevant risk assessment forms, Tendo-kun. Here they are."

Soun looked incredulously at the papers that his old training partner had handed to him.

Risk: Rampage. Control Measure: Ranma has had years of training and is regularly fed, reducing the risk of violent incident.

Risk: Poaching for trophy, meat or fur. Control Measure: Part of Ranma's training has included evasion tactics. He has also learnt to seek out hot water as soon as possible in the event of the activation of his bear related curse.

"Wait, bear related curse? What are you talking about, Saotome?"

"Nihao!" a cheerful voice called out as a curvy young woman with purple hair and wearing a Chinese-style silk outfit approached.

"Ah, this is the unnecessary danger I mentioned earlier," Genma winced.

"Nihao, Airen," the Chinese warrior said as she hugged the bear.

The bear gave a disapproving shake of his head.

"What's going on, Father?" another young woman asked as she approached the front door.

"Kasumi… I… I don't know anymore. I thought I was talking with my old training partner, but there's also a bear, and now there's a girl… I… perhaps I should have a lie down for a bit?" Soun said, his voice faltering.

"Yes, you do that, Father. I'll see to our guests. Please come in," Kasumi smiled.

As the trio followed Kasumi, Soun Tendo closed the front door and finally fainted.

* * *

><p>"So, how do you know my father?" Kasumi asked as she poured out three cups of tea.<p>

"We trained together for many years. Long, numerous hardships and many dangerous situations. We should never have been allowed to do such things," the balding man added, sighing sadly.

"And what about the bear?"

"I explain," the Chinese girl said, pouring her tea over the head of the hairy beast sitting to her right.

Kasumi's jaw dropped as she saw what seemed to be impossible: a bear morphed into a young man.

"W-what?"

"I'm Ranma Saotome," the young man bowed politely. It was then that he noticed his shirt was missing. "Not again…"

"It alright, no-one mind if you not wear shirt," the Chinese girl said as she rested her head on Ranma's arm.

"I'm sorry, but who are you, Miss?" Kasumi asked, turning her attention to the affectionate young woman.

"Shampoo," the purple-haired lovely smiled. She clamped herself onto one of Ranma's arms and let out a contented sigh.

"Could you explain things a little more, Miss Shampoo? Why are you travelling with the Saotomes?"

"Long story, I not want to tell it right now," Shampoo said, closing her eyes as she felt the warmth of the man she loved calm her.

Ranma rolled his eyes. "We met in China, and she's decided to follow me around."

"That's not all, Shampoo have to prove herself against Ranma's fiancée."

"Fiancée? Pops, is there something that you wanted to tell me? I thought we were just meeting up with your old friend…" Ranma said, glaring angrily at his father.

"I… calm down, Ranma. You don't want to get stressed; it's bad for your health…" Genma said, sweating nervously.

"Ok, Pops," the pigtailed Saotome said, nodding calmly. "If you start explaining things, I might start to calm down."

"Well, the thing is, we wanted to…"

"Wanted to what?"

"We wanted to secure the legacy of the Tendo Dojo," Genma said. "And what better way than to have our children marry?"

"Oh, that makes sense," Ranma nodded, visibly calmer. "But when were you going to mention this to me?"

"Well, part of the risk assessment for your being a bear is that I don't antagonise a large carnivore with big teeth and big claws… I was waiting for the right moment."

"I'm not angry, Pops. A little disappointed, perhaps, but not angry. Though, when were you going to mention it to me, Shampoo?" the pigtailed youth asked, his gaze narrowing.

"I was asked not to talk about it," Shampoo shrugged, her breasts rubbing against Ranma's arm. "You forgive me, yes?"

"… Yes, but I don't like being lied to."

"Ok, Shampoo not lie to Ranma from now on. Shampoo like it when Ranma no wear shirt."

"There's a difference between not lying to someone and not saying everything that's on your mind, Shampoo," Genma said, a hint of exasperation in his voice.

The Chinese girl shrugged again, causing her breasts to rub against Ranma. "Shampoo think it best to be honest in all things. No point in lying about feelings for Ranma."

"So what now?" the pigtailed man asked, directing a serious look at his father. "We're here at your friend's house, and please don't get me wrong – it's a very nice house, but if he's not here to discuss things, then I guess we should leave…"

"I'll get Father," Kasumi said, rising from the table.

When they were alone, Ranma turned to his father. "You are serious about this engagement, aren't you?"

"Very serious, Ranma."

"You're not hiding anything from me are you?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" the portly man scoffed. "And put a shirt on, you'll catch a chill."

"Fine," the cursed teenager sigh as he went to pick a shirt out of his bag.

Shampoo pouted, but continued to watch Ranma dress. It was then that something occurred to her.

"Ranma, why you no have to change all clothes when you change from bear to boy?"

"I don't know, Shampoo," Ranma admitted. The constant need for a fresh shirt was irritating, but at least he didn't need to find new trousers when he got caught in the rain.

"Hey! Who are you? What are you doing in my house!" an angry girl demanded.

"We're guests of your father," Genma answered. "I'm Genma Saotome, and this is my son, Ranma."

"And what about you?" the girl asked, turning her attention to Shampoo.

"Shampoo," the Chinese girl answered, barely giving the upset girl a second thought.

Soun entered the room with Kasumi, who immediately left again to make a fresh pot of tea. "Saotome-kun, I… is that your son?"

"Hello, Mr. Tendo," Ranma greeted, bowing politely. "Sorry about the whole bear thing earlier, it's complicated."

"What happened to that bear?"

"Ranma is the bear, it's a long, tragic tale that could have been avoided if proper health and safety procedures had been in place," Genma answered; clearly dismayed by something that had happened in China.

"Akane, could please you get Nabiki from her room, something tells me that this is a story we should all hear," the moustachioed man said, somehow finding some semblance of dignity.

* * *

><p>Akane knocked on the door to Nabiki's room.<p>

"Nabiki, are you alright?" she called out to her sister.

"Shush… the bear…"

"What are you talking about, Nabiki? There's no bear here. I think we'd notice a bear in the house, don't you?" Akane chided. "And open this door."

"You didn't see it earlier – it was black, but had a white crescent on its chest," Nabiki insisted. "Bears don't just disappear into thin air!"

"Whatever, Dad wants you to come downstairs and meet our guests. You remember that thing he told us about the other day?" the youngest sister asked. "I think it's about that."

The door opened and the middle sister peered out onto the landing. "What makes you say that?"

"There's this boy downstairs."

Nabiki perked up at that revelation. "A boy? What's he look like? Is he cute?"

"I guess so…" Akane shrugged. "He's got some girl with him though, so I don't know what's going on there."

"You're sure there's no bear?"

"Very sure, Nabiki."

"Fine," the short-haired Tendo conceded. "Let's see what's going on then."

* * *

><p>The Tendos sat opposite the Saotomes, Soun and Genma were engaging in some small talk, the children were all silent.<p>

Shampoo was observing the whole situation. She had found it hard to feel anything other than violent scorn for the older Saotome when he was in his original, uncursed from.

Untrustworthy, devious, light-fingered and a dirty fighter: Genma Saotome was the sort of person that you told stories about to warn people about why you shouldn't reveal all your treasures to your guests, regardless of what they offered in exchange.

How he managed to sire the likes of Ranma, Shampoo had no idea.

"So, long ago, we had a plan to unite the Schools of Anything Goes," Soun said in his most authoritative voice. "Kasumi, 19; Nabiki, 17 and Akane, 16; pick one to be your fiancée."

"…"

Shampoo cleared her throat. She had appraised the Tendo sisters and found them lacking. "So when do we fight for Ranma?"

"What?" the moustachioed man asked, caught off guard.

"We fight for Ranma; is why I in Japan," the Chinese girl explained. "I was promised the chance to prove myself the best choice for Ranma by him."

Genma swallowed nervously as he became the centre of attention. "I… I can explain…"

"Please do," Ranma said through clenched teeth. "I had a feeling that Shampoo wasn't just travelling with us to see the world."

"I happy to see the world with Ranma," the purple-haired girl said.

"I see that we don't need to bother with this engagement," Akane said. "Ranma's already got a girlfriend."

"So you admit defeat already? You wiser than people our age normally are," Shampoo said sagely.

"What's that supposed to mean?" the youngest sister demanded.

"You know not to fight when you cannot win; is ancient wisdom."

Akane's hand clenched, causing the teacup to crack loudly. "What makes you think that I can't beat you in a fight?"

Shampoo smirked. "When do you want to prove me wrong?"

"The dojo, now!"

The balding Saotome panicked. "Wait, wait, we can't just have people fighting! What about the risk assessment?"

"You mentioned those earlier, Saotome-kun, what's with your health and safety obsession?"

"It happen in China; Mr. Saotome land in cursed spring in Jusenkyo. Ranma fall in spring, too," Shampoo replied.

"Those pools are a nightmare! Who knows how many lives have been ruined by that place?" Genma asked rhetorically. "I knocked Ranma into a spring of cold water, and when he emerged, he had turned into a bear. He took me by surprise and I fell into another spring."

"What? You're trying to pull a fast one here," Nabiki decided.

"Ranma, do you mind showing everyone your curse?"

"Fine," the pigtailed Saotome sighed as he emptied a nearby vase over his head.

In the blink of an eye, Ranma turned from a toned martial artist into a black-furred bear with a white crescent near its throat.

"The bear!" Nabiki screamed as she scrambled to get away from the beast.

Ranma sat back on his haunches, and gave the ursine equivalent of a sigh.

"I understand your problem, Ranma. I see many people with curses. Could be worse – could be a piglet or duck," Shampoo said, trying to comfort her beau.

Ranma sighed again, but smiled back at her.

"So, which one of you will be Ranma's fiancée?" Genma asked, turning to look at the three sisters.

"N-not it…" Nabiki insisted. "What if he eats me?"

The bear rolled his eyes and yawned, showing his fine collection of pointy looking teeth.

"See, he's thinking about eating us now!"

Kasumi frowned. She didn't anyone want to be eaten, it would make a terrible mess.

Akane looked on in amazement. How could someone turn into a bear? It had to be a trick.

"I see that Akane seems to be the most enthusiastic about this," Soun said in a tone that he felt carried a suitable weight.

"Yes, he wants Akane," Nabiki quickly agreed.

"Don't I get some say in this?" Akane protested.

"Don't worry, all Akane need to do is lose in fight for Ranma," Shampoo smiled.

"Fight? What kind of fight?" the youngest Tendo asked.

"Prove that you good wife for Ranma," the Amazon replied. "Prove that you have skills to make good home."

Soun nodded sagely. "Then it's decided, Ranma and Akane will be engaged. I know that Akane would make a good wife."

"Then we start contest tomorrow. We fight after breakfast," Shampoo decided. This would stop all the nonsense from Ranma's idiotic father.

After a few contests with Akane, Shampoo could prove that she was the best suited to be Ranma's bride and they could live together happily ever after.

"It'll have to be properly monitored," Genma said. "I don't want anyone to be hurt."

* * *

><p>That evening, the Saotomes were sharing a bath before dinner. Ranma wasn't terribly impressed with his father's plan, but at least it had been concocted by him when he'd been under the influence of his curse.<p>

Normally, Genma would have just blundered in and tried to force him into an engagement with the nearest Tendo girl.

"So, old man-"

"You should show more respect, boy!" the portly man interrupted with a smack round the back of his son's head.

"When you earn it, you'll get it. Didn't you teach me something like that?"

"…" Genma couldn't come up with a suitable reply immediately, so waved Ranma on to continue with his point. "What was it you wanted to ask?"

"What sort of contest were you thinking of holding for Shampoo and Akane? And what are you going to do if Shampoo wins? Mr. Tendo isn't going to let us stay if his daughter loses."

"Play dirty, of course!"

"Shampoo will cut your balls off if you try to cheat her," Ranma said as he calmly inspected his fingernails.

"You'll be the one who does the sabotaging," Genma insisted.

"I'm not going to cheat Shampoo. And if you try to make me, I'll confess everything to her," the pigtailed man looked at the disapproving look on his father's face. "Don't look at me like that – you're the one who wanted me to play dirty."

"That's not what I had in mind, and you know it!"

"Doesn't matter, I'm not going to interfere with anyone's fight," Ranma said as he stood up out the bathtub. "Now, let's get dressed before dinner."

"Fine," the balding man sighed. "Do you think Akane has much of a chance against Shampoo?"

"Depends," the younger Saotome shrugged as he towelled himself off. "Is Mr. Tendo as good a teacher as you?"

"So you finally admit that I'm a good teacher! At last, my son shows his father the respect he deserves!" Genma declared happily.

"Yeah, yeah, you're a good teacher. Now, how do Mr. Tendo's skills stack up?"

"… I might need a plan for tomorrow…"

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><p>Elsewhere the younger Tendo sisters were questioning Shampoo about her relationship with Ranma.<p>

"Ranma come to Shampoo's village," the Chinese girl said. "Panic ensue, but someone spot Jusenkyo guide and we find that bear actually Ranma. Shampoo make marriage challenge to Ranma."

"Marriage challenge?" Nabiki repeated.

"In my village, if man want to marry woman, he have to beat them in fight. If you no can beat them, you not worthy husband," Shampoo explained.

Akane was somewhat unsettled by the parallels between the small Chinese village and her own situation in Nerima. "I… but what if you don't want to marry the guy, but can't fight him off?"

"In my village, everyone learn to fight from early age, but know what you mean. Talk with village elders and they help out."

"Do girls get to make their own challenges?" Nabiki asked, curious as to what sort of fighting skills the purple-haired girl had. "And what happens if you don't declare your challenge?"

"Woman not normally challenge man, but can do when man outsider. Sometimes, challenge not issued, but when outsider of opposite sex defeat Amazon warrior, they get engaged. If same sex, they fight to death," Shampoo sighed. "Shampoo lucky Ranma not fall into Nyanniichuan…"

She noticed that she was getting blank looks, "Spring of Drowned Girl."

"Oh," Akane replied. "So if Ranma had fallen into a different spring, he could turn into a girl?"

"Yes. Or cat, duck, piglet or any of hundred different things. Whatever fall into spring take form of what last drowned in there. Is very cursed place; used only for punishment."

"Wow… you have some… interesting things in China," Nabiki commented diplomatically.

"Yes," Shampoo nodded. "Japan nice, too."

"Thank you, Shampoo," a male voice said from the doorway. "You can see why I wanted to come home."

"Ah, Ranma, you finished in bath," the Amazon observed. "Shampoo use it before dinner, ok?"

"Yes, of course," Akane nodded. "I'll show you the way."

Nabiki suddenly felt a little uncomfortable at being left alone with Ranma.

"Something wrong?" the cursed martial artist asked.

"N-no," the brunette replied. "I… I'm just going to see how long until dinner's ready."

"Ok," Ranma shrugged as Nabiki rushed into the kitchen. "Strange girl…"

* * *

><p>Genma found his old training partner looking rather despondent about things.<p>

"Tendo-kun?"

"Saotome-kun… why did you allow your son to get a girlfriend in China?"

"It's a long story, Tendo-kun," Genma said as he sat down next to his friend. "Over the years, Ranma and I found ourselves in so many scrapes. Perhaps the most serious one was when we were in China. After our incident at Jusenkyo, we found ourselves in Shampoo's village.

"Things were going well. At first they assumed that I had a pet bear, when Ranma's hunger got the better of him."

"Ranma's hunger got the better of him?" Soun repeated sceptically. Then it clicked that Ranma had arrived as a bear, and so would require more food than a normal teenager. "What happened? Did you eat someone's banquet?"

"Well, sort of. They were having some contest and we accidently ate some of the winner's prize..." the balding man admitted. "But before things got out of hand and Ranma was skinned alive, I splashed him with some hot soup. That got everyone's attention and we were able to calm things down."

"Ok, so then what happened? How did you get from everyone wanting to kill you and Ranma to you allowing him to get a girlfriend?"

"That required some quick thinking on my part, Tendo-kun. Shampoo decided that she liked the look of Ranma, but their local traditions are a little backwards. It seems that they have to trap outsiders for strong mates," Genma embellished. "So she challenged him, and Ranma being the man he is, he accepted. It was only then that I discovered their trickery and plans to keep him there.

"I couldn't allow Ranma to be kept there, not with our sacred pledge, I tried to tell them that, but they were adamant that their laws took precedence. But I'm nothing, if not cunning."

"Indeed, Saotome-kun, your cunning rivals that of many politicians on the Nerima council," Soun nodded, having experienced said cunning on more than one occasion. "What happened next?"

"I told them that Ranma would only marry the most suitable candidate, and that Shampoo would have to prove herself against your daughters."

"Dinner's ready!" Kasumi called out, ending the discussion for now.

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><p>Over dinner, Soun was casting worried looks over his three children. While he expected his youngest to give it her all, he couldn't help but be worried for her.<p>

'Akane has never fought someone like this before. And the stakes are so high…'

Kasumi looked on, having decided that it was nice that her father had one of his friends around. He had looked lonely over the past few months.

'Father doesn't look as happy as I would have thought… Perhaps he's worried that Ranma's bear curse is unsettling Nabiki? I don't know why though, he does look rather cute…'

She blushed before quickly turning her attention back to her meal, hoping that no-one saw it.

She was in luck, as everyone was focused on their own thoughts.

Akane didn't think that the stakes were particularly high. Aside from her own pride, what would she lose if she lost to Shampoo?

She wouldn't have to marry Ranma. Why would she want to do that? She had only just met him.

'That said,' she mused, 'if I did win, I could use this to get Kuno off my case…'

Nabiki was hoping that Akane just gave a token resistance to Shampoo. She knew that Akane wasn't terribly enamoured with the male gender as a whole, so the odds of her wanting to be engaged to Ranma were astronomical. Plus, the sooner she lost to Shampoo, the sooner Ranma would be gone.

Bears' reputation as a dangerous species was not undeserved. And the way Ranma seemed so calm about things gave her the creeps.

Shampoo had already appraised Akane and found her lacking. Not that she was going to take her lightly. She'd seen what had happened when one of her peers had been overconfident during the tournament.

It was almost certain that Lotion's nose would never look the same again.

Ranma wasn't too bothered which way the morning's fight went. Sure, he didn't want anyone to get hurt, but if Shampoo won, he'd move on to find his mother. If she lost, then he'd stick around and see what Akane was like as a person.

'I wonder what kind of cook she is…'

Genma Saotome was too busy eating to think about anything else; Kasumi's cooking rivalled Shampoo's for quality.

'Om-nom-nom-nom-nom-nom.'

* * *

><p>To be continued…<p>

As you can see, I'm not yet dead.

Feel free to stalk me on Twitter, I'm (at)LordRaa.


	2. Part 2

Exit, Pursued by a Bear

By Lord Raa

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><p>Disclaim-me-do: We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves.<p>

* * *

><p>Part 2<p>

* * *

><p>Ranma yawned loudly as he woke up to the morning sunshine. He'd been "convinced" by Mr. Tendo to spend the night in the dojo to preserve Shampoo's modesty.<p>

Of course, Shampoo had been happy to share the same room as Ranma, and was going to until Kasumi declared that it was improper. And while the Tendo sisters were friendly enough, they decided that they didn't want to disturb Shampoo's sleep before the big fight to settle the engagement to Ranma.

That left him sleeping downstairs with his old man in the dojo.

Genma had convinced his friend to let him sleep on his bedroom floor on the last of the bedding, much to Ranma's annoyance. The response to Ranma's protests about the perceived injustice was a swift application of cold water.

And that was why he woke up as a bear.

It was a strange sensation to wake up in his cursed form, especially after a heavy sleep. Normally, he was able to wake up pretty quickly in the morning, as lie-ins weren't something Ranma was used to. But when he slept as a bear, things took much longer for him to gain the motivation to get up and start moving around.

He yawned again, running his long tongue over his pointy teeth.

'Definitely time for something to eat,' he thought. 'But first, the bathroom…'

* * *

><p>Nabiki had not slept well. It wasn't thinking about the upcoming match between her younger sister and the Chinese girl that had disrupted her sleep.<p>

Nor was it the suspicious man her father called a friend.

No, it was the fact that Genma Saotome had splashed Ranma in the face with a cold drink and turned him into a bear before telling him to sleep in the dojo.

Sure, the door to her room was kept locked, but who knew how strong the bear was? Popular martial arts manga often had the protagonist train in the mountains and spar with bears.

'They wouldn't put that in if bears were pushovers,' the money-loving girl had mused.

The alarm sounded, further souring her mood.

"Stupid mornings, stupid engagement, stupid Ranma," she grumbled. Slipping on her dressing gown, she unlocked the door and peered out.

The coast was clear.

* * *

><p>Shampoo had long learned that the ability to get some rest in even unfamiliar and uncomfortable surroundings, and the spare room of the Tendo home certainly was unfamiliar to her.<p>

It wasn't quite as comfortable as her bed back in China, but this was a spare room. At least they weren't sleeping rough by some rain soaked riverbank.

That had not been a pleasant experience.

Shaking her head to clear it and focus on the latest problem on her way to winning Ranma's heart, Shampoo took several deep breaths and started to stretch her muscles.

* * *

><p>The two masters of Anything Goes martial arts were next to wake.<p>

Soun had his doubts about his friend's plan and he turned to him

"Saotome-kun, do you really think that Shampoo will give up on Ranma if she loses?"

"Probably not, she's taken a shine to the boy," the balding man replied. "Understandable, really, given the old Saotome charm."

"You're hardly the classical definition of charming, Saotome-kun," Soun muttered under his breath. "Still, what will we do if she doesn't give up?"

"Shampoo knows that Ranma holds anyone who goes back against their word in low regard," Genma answered. "If she wants to keep in his good books, she'll play by the rules."

* * *

><p>Nabiki was feeling better now that she had finished in the bathroom. She'd combed her fingers through her hair, working out the more severe tangles and so felt that she looked a little more presentable.<p>

However, the cool look she'd been perfecting over the school term was about to be shaken as she opened the door and saw Ranma standing there.

"B-b-b-b-b-bear!" the girl screamed, trying to draw the attention of her family. "I won't let you eat me!"

Ranma folded his arms and shook his head. There had only been one person he'd attacked as a bear – his father. And there were good reasons for that.

Before the trip to Jusenkyo, most of the plans Genma Saotome had made were terrible. Sure, when it came to martial arts, he was possibly the most effective teacher around, but certain parts of this training were, well stupid.

The training at the cursed pools of Jusenkyo sprang to mind. Ranma got through no end of shirts now that he seemed to spend half his time as a bear.

The latest seemed to be the arranged marriage that brought them here to Nerima.

While it did have the advantage of delaying things with Shampoo, being screamed at by a girl when he really needed to use the bathroom was going to get old real fast.

Akane Tendo was the first one to arrive on the scene.

"What's up, Nabiki?"

The brunette could only point incredulously at the white-throated bear on the landing.

"Oh, that. Ranma, please move out of the way," Akane said pleasantly.

Shrugging, the hairy beast shuffled backwards to allow Nabiki to escape to her room.

"So, why are you a bear, anyway?"

Ranma mimed a shiver to indicate that it had been a chilly night.

"Oh yeah, it can get cold in the dojo," Akane nodded.

The bear nodded before strolling into the bathroom. He grabbed the rinse bucket and filled it with water from the bath. Moments later, a shirtless young man closed the door and attended to his business.

"…" the Tendo heir stood still, trying to process what she'd seen.

"You watch Ranma wash?" Shampoo asked, unsure of how her opponent felt about Ranma.

"What?" Akane asked, spinning around in surprise. "Watch a boy washing? What kind of person wants to do that?"

"Is Ranma," the Amazon countered, "He different to other boys."

"He turns into a bear, how many boys do that?"

"Jusenkyo near my village, some people there turn into animals. But that not what Shampoo mean. Ranma strong, handsome, help people out of trouble."

"Oh, but that doesn't mean-"

Akane's comment was cut off as Ranma opened the bathroom door. The pigtailed martial artist was towelling off his well-toned torso.

"Is something up?"

"Put a shirt on!" Akane spluttered in protest.

Ranma shrugged. "You're lucky I'm still wearing pants."

The youngest Tendo's cheeks turned scarlet, her mouth seemingly unable to work properly and voice her protests at such an outrageous comment.

"Whatever, I'm going to practice in the dojo before breakfast."

"Shampoo be down soon, we practice together, ok?"

"Sure thing," the cursed youth said as he made his way to the dojo.

* * *

><p>As Kasumi cleared the breakfast table, Soun gave his old friend a look and rose up from his seat to assist.<p>

"Is something the matter, Father?"

"It's alright, Kasumi, I just wanted to help out."

It was unusual for anyone to offer to help out, but Kasumi accepted the offer. It would allow the important match to get started sooner. 'Nabiki seems rather upset about Ranma-kun's presence.'

"Of course, Father," the homemaker smiled.

As they placed the empty pots into the kitchen, Soun coughed nervously.

"What is it, Father?"

"Kasumi, I…" the moustachioed man struggled for words for a moment. "I'm worried about Akane."

"You're worried about Akane? Why is that?" Kasumi asked, turning to see the look on her father's face.

"Well, it's more about the pledge to unite the schools of Anything Goes," Soun admitted. "If Akane loses, Ranma-kun will have no reason to stay here. Shampoo will go off with him and the legacy of the Tendo Dojo will... And family honour…"

He started to sob, causing Kasumi to gently hold his upper arms.

"I'm sure that everything will work out fine, Father. But I have to ask, which one of us were you planning to engage to Ranma-kun? Nabiki doesn't like him very much."

"That leaves it up to you and Akane, Kasumi," the emotional man replied.

"I think Akane would be best, they're the same age and would have more in common," Kasumi opined.

Soun's face lit up as he realised that Kasumi was going along with his plan. "Yes, I see that too. But Saotome-kun seems to think that Shampoo's quite the skilled fighter, what do we do if she defeats Akane?"

Kasumi looked thoughtful as she cleaned up in the kitchen. Family honour demanded that an arranged marriage between a Saotome and a Tendo took place, but if Shampoo won, Ranma would leave.

Cheating wasn't an option, as it would bring dishonour and shame upon everyone involved. That meant that the rules would have to be obeyed.

It was then that the homemaker was struck by a flash of inspiration. "Father, we have to obey the rules."

"Yes," Soun nodded sadly.

Ranma interrupted the conversation to bring Soun and Kasumi to the dojo. "Sorry about this, but everyone wants to get this over with as soon as possible. Well, I say 'everyone', but it's really Akane, Shampoo and Nabiki. My old man's quite happy to delay this until tomorrow."

"And what about you, Ranma-kun?" the widower asked.

"I'm not that bothered, to be honest," the cursed youth shrugged. "I mean, sure, you have a nice house and whoever cooked dinner and breakfast did a great job, but if I've got to move on, I've got to move on."

"I see," Soun nodded. "Well, let us get this little challenge solved as soon as we can, shall we?"

* * *

><p>As Akane performed a few warm up exercises in the dojo, her sister sidled up to her.<p>

"Akane," Nabiki said in a conspiratorial whisper. "About this match you're having."

"What about it?"

"Are you sure you need to go all out against Shampoo?"

"I think I better," the martial artist answered. "From what she says about her village, they train everyone in martial arts.

Nabiki's poker face remained intact as she followed up. "But how much of that is like Kuno's hot air? No-one trains their entire village to fight, it's just not practical. I mean what about the old and infirm? I don't see someone like Kasumi being a dead-eye shot with a bow."

The mental image of their older, kind and most definitely non-violent sister taking down animals and marauding warriors with a few well-placed arrows brought a smile to Akane and Nabiki's faces.

"Ok, so maybe they don't teach everyone to be assassins. What's your point, Nabiki?"

"I was thinking that I might make it worth your while to not push yourself too far," the mercenary girl hinted.

Akane's face fell. "You're… you're asking me to lose on purpose?"

"I'm not asking you to go all TV fight scene on me, but maybe not try as hard as you would against Kuno," Nabiki replied.

"I have my pride as a martial artist!"

"What good is your pride as a martial artist if you have to marry Ranma?"

The door to the dojo opened and Shampoo stepped inside, cutting off that argument.

"Nice dojo," the purple-haired girl commented, running her fingers over the walls and floor. "Is sturdy construction and well looked after."

After placing a towel and water bottle in a corner, Shampoo started to stretch her major muscle groups. While the warm up exercises were important, a casual demonstration of her flexibility could help give her a psychological edge.

Many animals did things to make themselves look more dangerous to their opponents and this was no different.

Nabiki looked on in awe at the Amazon's movements. 'Maybe I won't have to worry about hurting Akane's feelings about her throwing this match after all. Should save me a few yen, too.'

Genma Saotome walked into the dojo and looked around. He nodded at Shampoo before taking lap of the building, taking in the details of woodwork and the levels of wear and tear on the weapons on the walls.

"Can we help you Mr. Saotome?" Nabiki asked.

"Just looking at the moment," the portly man answered with a wistful look on his face. 'What a difference a connection or two makes… Wait, why aren't there more students on the list?'

Sighing, Genma approached the two sisters. "Are you ready, Akane?"

"Yes, I am," the long-haired Tendo nodded positively.

"Good, Shampoo tends to use weapons out of habit, so I hope your sensei taught you how to counter them if you lose your own."

"Weapons? But I focused on unarmed techniques," Akane sighed.

"Oh well, I'm sure that your best will be enough today, Akane," Nabiki said in a voice filled with insincere support.

"Really? Well, in that case we should make the fight an unarmed match," Genma said as the door opened again.

Soun was the first in and he made a beeline over to his old training partner.

"Ah, Tendo-kun, I think we should make this match an unarmed contest."

"You do? Why is that?" the moustachioed asked. He was turned around to see the practice swings Shampoo was taking. "Oh."

"Don't worry, she's a bit sloppy when it comes to unarmed combat," Genma explained.

Ranma held the door open and Kasumi stepped inside, just as the rain started, turning the pigtailed martial artist into a bear.

"Bear!" Nabiki screamed in panic.

The black-furred beast sighed. 'If only I'd fallen into that panda spring; everything would be alright. No-one runs scared from pandas!'

Ranma slunk off to a corner to watch the match. He was beginning to hope that Shampoo won easily. Not that he wanted to go back to China with her, but it would mean that he wouldn't have to deal with Nabiki's hostility.

Frowning ever so slightly, Kasumi looked down and saw a shredded shirt on the floor. "Has anyone lost a shirt?" she asked holding up the ruined garment.

"We're all fine here, Kasumi," Akane said having checked her family, Genma and Shampoo.

A loud sigh from the far corner seemed to answer the homemaker's question as to the owner of the shirt.

"Ranma lose another shirt? Maybe Ranma have to stop wearing shirts altogether," Shampoo said, a smile on her lips as she thought about the merits of her beloved walking around shirtless all the time.

Kasumi's cheeks turned pink as she also considered Ranma's physique, having seen it the previous day. "T-that's just not practical. Tokyo gets cold in the winter months."

"Plenty of ways to keep warm," the Amazon smirked before taking a swig of water from her bottle. "Shampoo ready to begin. Let's fight."

Akane nodded. This would be a good test of her skills; as skilled as he was, Kuno seemed to hold back against her.

Soun embraced his youngest daughter. "I want you to try your best, but don't try so hard that you hurt yourself."

"Of course, Daddy," the Tendo heir nodded. Not that she had any intention of doing this or anything half-heartedly. It just wasn't her style.

The two combatants approached the centre of the dojo and bowed to each other. The fell into defensive stances and waited for the signal to begin.

Tears were now welling up in Soun's eyes as he gave the command to start the match.

"Begin!"

The two girls circled each other, each waiting for the right moment to strike. This went on for nearly a minute, slowly increasing the tension levels before Shampoo lashed out with a flurry of strikes open palm strikes, each of them forcing Akane backwards as she attempted to avoid them.

Mindful that she was overreaching and off balance, Shampoo stopped to give herself the chance to rebalance.

It was then that Akane struck back with a simple, but powerful haymaker.

It was child's play for the Amazon to avoid such a strike, and she punished her opponent with a sharp blow to the side of the ribs.

"Oof," Akane gasped, unused to serious contact in her training.

The doorbell rang and Kasumi looked at her father before announcing that the match would have to be put on hold for the moment.

"But…" Nabiki tried to protest.

"This could be important, Nabiki, I'll be right back," the homemaker said, completely missing her sister's point.

Shampoo backed up, allowing her opponent to regain her breath. She reappraised the girl, and she was not impressed with what she saw.

Deciding that it was time for a little trash-talk, she asked Akane, "You really think you're suitable to be Ranma's bride?"

Unfortunately, this question coincided with the return of Kasumi and the visitor, one Tatewaki Kuno.

"What?" the kendoist demanded. "What was that about Akane being someone's bride?"

"Who are you?" Shampoo asked, unhappy at the interruption.

"Who am I? I am none other than the rising star of the kendo world, the Blue Thunder of Furinkan High School!" Kuno declared.

"Weren't you the 'Shooting Star' last week?" Akane asked, also unhappy with Kuno's presence.

"Akane Tendo, you cannot know how much joy it brings to my heart to know that you follow my progress in the kendo world!" the young man declared before rushing to embrace the love of his life.

The Chinese girl casually stuck out a foot and tripped up the blowhard, causing him to plant his face into the hardwood floor of the dojo.

"Whoops," Shampoo said with a totally insincere look on her face.

"Who…." Kuno trailed off as he finally got a good look at Shampoo. "Who is this beautiful fighter, capable of matching even the fierce tigress that is Akane Tendo in honourable combat?"

"Shampoo," the Amazon answered. "And you're interrupting the contest to be Ranma's bride."

"What? Who could have the audacity to try to engineer the situation where two glorious visions of beauty would fight for the right to be his mate?" Kuno asked, his face completely straight as he looked around for a likely culprit. "Who is this 'Ranma' person?

"That's Ranma there," Shampoo said, pointing at the bear in the corner.

"A bear? Surely this is some kind of a joke? What kind of bear could have some sway over the glorious flower that is Akane Tendo?"

Ranma had quickly grown tired of the newly arrived idiot and wanted to silence him soon after he'd introduced himself. And now he was bad-mouthing bears in general.

Shaking his ursine head, Ranma rose up onto his hind legs and let out a growl.

"He's going to attack us! Run for your lives!" Nabiki screamed before rushing out of the dojo.

"Truly this bear must be some demonic monstrosity for it to scare the unflappable Nabiki Tendo," Kuno opined as he pulled a bokken from nowhere and took up a stance to challenge Ranma. "The heavens have smiled up on you, Akane Tendo, for I shall now defeat this unholy bear!"

Ranma looked at the idiot with the wooden sword and sighed. He grabbed Kuno by the lapels and tossed him against the dojo wall, causing the whole building to shake.

The black-furred beast folded his arms and nodded in triumph.

"Well, of course you're strong enough to throw Kuno around like a rag doll, you're a bear!" Akane countered.

"You think that Ranma's only strong when he's a bear?" Shampoo asked, almost laughing in disbelief. "We show you how wrong you are."

The Amazon walked to where several wooden weapons were stored and pulled out a bokken before tossing it to Ranma.

The bear caught the weapon and began to work through a kata that made Shampoo's earlier warm-up exercises look like an arthritic old man struggling to get out of an easy chair.

Shampoo pulled out a wooden naginata and took a few practice swings of her own before she announced her readiness to Ranma.

The bear snorted before taking up a stance designed to minimise his profile, his weapon held in his right paw before he charged his opponent.

Shampoo struggled to block the flurry of strikes, much in the same was as Akane had struggled during the earlier match. Before she knew it, she was reacting on instinct to avoid the infrequent leg sweeps that Ranma had started introducing to unbalance her.

Kuno woke up from his nap and shook his head to clear it. What was this scene before him?

Had he been knocked unconscious by Akane Tendo and he was now dreaming as he saw the bouncy girl fighting with a bear?

He turned to look at Akane, who also seemed to be focused on the unusual combatants.

"Akane Tendo-"

The Blue Thunder of Furinkan High School was cut off when Shampoo had been launched into him by Ranma.

The bear let out a triumphant roar that would have caused Nabiki to soil herself if she had been there to hear it.

"I… Forgive me, Miss Shampoo, but I must avenge your defeat at the hands of the Devil Bear!" Kuno declared as he rushed to his feet.

Only to be smacked down again by the so-called Devil Bear, this time into unconsciousness.

"Oh my, well, we can't continue the match now," Kasumi said as she noticed that Shampoo was still slightly stunned from her impact with Kuno. "We should continue this another time."

"Yes, it wouldn't be fair if one of the participants was carrying an injury," Soun said, nodding his head. "Don't you agree, Saotome-kun?"

"Of course, Tendo-kun," the portly man readily agreed. 'It will also give us a chance to train Akane so she has a chance against Shampoo.'

* * *

><p>To be continued…<p>

Pre-read by Chi Vayne and previewed on certain intertubes.

Feel free to stalk me on Twitter. You should be able to figure out what my user name is by now.


	3. Part 3

Exit, Pursued by a Bear

By Lord Raa

* * *

><p>Disclaim-me-do: Good morning beautiful breasts of my neighbour. How did you get inside these binoculars?<p>

* * *

><p>Part 3<p>

* * *

><p>Nabiki was not happy with the latest bombshell her father dropped.<p>

"What?"

"Ranma and his father will be staying here for the time being," the moustachioed man repeated. Misunderstanding the look on his middle daughter's face as one of confusion rather than one that was a mix of fear, anger and betrayal, explained why they would be staying.

"Akane needs more training before she can beat Shampoo, and Saotome-kun will be helping with that."

"But that means Ranma will be staying here!"

"Well, yes, he needs to continue his training if he's to take over the running of the dojo," Soun added as Shampoo walked up to them.

"Mr. Tendo, when do you think we'll be able have that rematch?"

"I'm not sure that we need to have a rematch," the mercenary girl answered. "You were clearly too much for Akane to handle."

"If you think I'm good, Ranma makes me look like a clumsy child," the Amazon shrugged, completely missing Nabiki's point.

"Yes, I did notice that Ranma is quite skilled. How long has he had that curse?"

"About a month," Shampoo answered. "But you should see him when he's in his normal body."

Nabiki noticed that Shampoo's body language changed when she mentioned Ranma's normal body. 'I just need to speed things up with this rematch…'

* * *

><p>A short while later, Soun, Genma and Akane were analysing the morning's match.<p>

"I think we might need to hold off on the rematch," Soun said, somewhat apologetically.

"What? Why?" the teenager asked.

"Your skills aren't where I expected them to be," Genma answered. "Ranma-"

"You don't think I'm good enough for Ranma?" Akane interrupted.

"I don't think you're good enough to beat Shampoo," the portly man replied curtly. "If you plan to marry Ranma and take over the dojo, then you'll need to be able to take on all challengers."

"Who said I wanted to marry Ranma?" Akane protested.

"But I thought that since he and you were the same age…" Soun trailed off, suddenly losing his voice under the withering glare from his youngest daughter.

"Regardless of which of you wants to marry Ranma, you'll have to beat Shampoo in the challenge," Genma said. "Shampoo's skills should have hinted to you how big the world of martial arts is. You might think that kendo boy is hot stuff, but he's nothing compared to what's out there."

Seeing that the Tendos were silenced by his words, the balding man continued. "If you're not straining every sinew, working every muscle to be the best, then you're no longer a martial artist. If you're not sore when you're going to bed, you're just a playing at keep-fit.

"Fitness classes won't keep a dojo open."

Soun swallowed, moved by his friend's words. "I… yes. We must train Akane harder; she must beat Shampoo."

"Don't I get any say in this?" Akane asked, beginning to feel railroaded by the two fathers.

"Even if you want Ranma to run the dojo, you need to improve to defeat Shampoo," the moustachioed man replied.

Nodding, Genma added, "Shampoo isn't invincible, not by a long shot. But it will be hard work. You're not a pampered city girl, who's afraid of a little hard work, are you, Akane-chan?"

"What? I'll show you hard work!" Akane shot back, her pride having taken a cheeky bitchslap at the hands of the fat man.

"Good. We start tomorrow morning at 5:30," the Saotome master smiled. "You too, Tendo-kun."

"What? But I've already done my apprenticeship!" Soun whined. "I don't need to get up that early anymore."

"Anything Goes solidarity," Genma replied. "You want to prove to your daughter that you're not all mouth and no trousers, don't you? That your style of Anything Goes can do more than defeat idiots like that kendo boy, right?"

"Well, yes…"

"Then it's decided, the three of us start tomorrow morning at 5:30, ready to train properly."

* * *

><p>Nabiki was passing the room where her father and younger sister were talking with Mr. Saotome.<p>

Curious as to what they were talking about, she crept closer for a spot of eavesdropping.

"Then it's decided, the three of us start tomorrow morning at 5:30, ready to train properly."

'Crap, they're still going for this duel thing with Shampoo? I'll have to sabotage things to get rid of Ranma.'

Slinking away, the mercenary girl left to think about what she could do to help speed up the departure of the Saotomes.

* * *

><p>It was nearly lunchtime, and Shampoo was feeling a little restless.<p>

Akane would have been easily dispatched, were it not for the interruption from that idiot with the bokken.

When one added in Nabiki's irrational dislike of Ranma and Kasumi's and the two fathers' insistence that there was a delay before the match was continued, her restlessness was turning into frustration.

Absently walking through the house, she found herself in the kitchen where Kasumi was preparing lunch.

"Can I help you, Shampoo?" the brunette asked.

"Feeling a bit restless. Can I help with lunch?" the Amazon asked.

"Yes, if you could wash and chop these vegetables for me, it would be a great help," Kasumi smiled.

As the two continued to prepare lunch, Kasumi's curiosity was getting the better of her.

"Err, Shampoo… how did you find yourself travelling to Japan with Ranma-kun?"

The purple-haired girl shrugged. "Is simple tale of girl encounters bear, bear turns into boy, girl challenges boy to stop idiot Mousse asking her out, boy's idiot father gets in the way of happy life and now girl has to fight other suitors for right to marry boy."

"That's hardly an everyday tale, Shampoo," Kasumi replied, smiling politely.

"You do not live with a local idiot who keeps bothering you," Shampoo shrugged as she chopped the vegetables.

"I take it you're referring to 'Mousse'?"

"Yes. He blind and stupid," the Chinese girl muttered angrily. "He bother me from early age. He nothing like Ranma."

"You like Ranma, don't you, Shampoo?" the brunette asked rhetorically.

"Ranma special, and I do not mean bear curse. He smart, cunning and strong. He so very strong," said the Amazon, thinking back to the time she'd pretended to hurt her ankle to get Ranma to carry her part of the way.

Genma Saotome hadn't approved, but a quick splash of cold water in his face and he soon understood why she couldn't walk on her "injured" ankle.

When he was in his cursed form, Genma Saotome was an incredibly fussy man, almost driving Shampoo to the point of physical violence at times. But he was easily convinced to do the sensible thing, like taking a ship back to Japan instead of swimming across open sea.

"So, Shampoo, what will you do if you lose to Akane?" Kasumi asked, rousing Shampoo from her thoughts.

"You do not think about losing. Only about what you can do to win," the Chinese girl answered. "Mr. Saotome teach that philosophy to Ranma."

"But…"

"You ever think 'what if dinner doesn't taste very nice'?"

"No," Kasumi admitted.

"It's the same thing."

* * *

><p>At lunch, Soun announced that there would be some changes to the normal daily schedule.<p>

"Oh, in what way, Father?" Kasumi asked. She was not one to embrace radical changes in her routine just for the sake of change.

"For a start, Saotome-kun and I will be stepping up Akane's training. This will mean starting training early in the morning," the moustachioed man answered.

"How long will it be before the rematch, Daddy?" Nabiki asked.

"I don't know just yet, Nabiki, but it shouldn't be too long before we can get this little contest settled," Soun smiled. "But not only that, Shampoo and Ranma will be attending school with you and Akane."

"It's going to take that long?" Nabiki blurted out, catching everyone by surprise.

"Well, Ranma will still need to go to school if Akane wins the challenge. We might as well register him and get him settled," Soun explained.

The middle Tendo daughter gritted her teeth and glared at Ranma. "I suppose that makes sense, Daddy."

Ranma just rolled his eyes at Nabiki's naked hostility while Shampoo shot threatening look of her own at the mercenary girl.

'What's her problem with Ranma? He's never tried to hurt her or any of her family. He doesn't want to force anyone into an engagement,' thought the Amazon. In fact, Shampoo had difficulty getting Ranma to see her as anything other than a training partner. And that was not because of a lack of effort on her part.

On several occasions on the trip to Japan, she'd snuggled up to him in the night. Though when she'd claimed that it was because it was cold, Genma had splashed Ranma with cold water to prevent any fooling around.

'Ranma's father might give the appearance of a fat lazy idiot, but he's a lot sharper than people think.'

The fact that Genma had trained Ranma to his current standard was proof enough of that.

Ranma made the wise decision to do his best to ignore Nabiki. The girl was attractive, yes, but he didn't need the hassle of a girl treating him like a time-bomb.

He turned his attention to Akane and Kasumi. They may have had their own personality quirks, but at least they didn't cower in fear whenever he entered the room.

* * *

><p>Later that afternoon, Akane was watching Ranma practising with his father in the dojo.<p>

She had seen that Ranma had some skill, even as a bear, but the display in front of her was a real eye-opener.

The pair dodged, ducked and moved in ways that seemed impossible to evade the countless punches and kicks they launched at each other.

Eventually, Ranma landed a good hit with his elbow on the back of his father's head, ending the match.

"Not bad, Ranma, at this rate you'll be able to take over the dojo when you're 30," the balding man said, goading his son.

"I'm… Oh, I see what you did there, Pops. Very sneaky, I can't let my guard down around you for a minute, can I?" Ranma replied.

"Can't blame me for trying, can you, Son?"

"No, I suppose I'd be the same in your position. At least you're not trying to force things. If that were the case, I'd have to get really violent," the pigtailed martial artist replied, quickly falling into a Jeet Kune Do stance. "Round two, old man."

"With pleasure, boy!" Genma said, jumping to his feet and gesturing for his son to attack.

Ranma took on the role of the dutiful student and grappled with his father, taking the pair of them to the ground.

As the two struggled on the floor, they rolled towards Akane.

The Tendo heir scrambled to get out of their way, knocking her bottle of water over Genma's head.

"Ranma, stop!" he called out.

"I'm not falling for that one again, Pops!" Ranma countered, continuing to keep his father in the choke-hold.

"But where's the PPE?" the balding man gasped. "Someone…could…get…hurt…"

"Isn't that the whole point of martial arts, Old Man?"

"T-that's not what I mean… What about the risk assessment? Or the liability waivers?"

Ranma realised what had happened and released his father from the choke-hold. He felt bad about hurting his father when he was in his cursed form. Not that he wasn't infuriating with his nit-picking and pedantry, but when Genma was in his health and safety mode, it felt like hating water because it was wet, or fire because it was hot.

'Or even a bear for being covered in fur,' the pigtailed Saotome mused. "Fine, do your risk assessment, I'm taking a break."

Akane watched Ranma walk off, into the house. "I thought that Ranma was serious about martial arts?"

"He is, but he's not concerned about important things like Health and Safety, which is a real shame."

The teenager could hear the capitalised "H" and "S" in Genma's words. "Is health and safety that important?"

"It's all fun and games until you lose an eye or the use of an arm, young lady," the portly man chided as he adjusted his glasses.

"Didn't you complain that I wasn't taking it seriously enough and that you were going to start training me and my dad at 5.30am?"

"Well, yes, but it still has to be done properly," Genma insisted. "You can't just throw someone into a pit of venomous snakes or someone's going to get hurt."

"Of course someone's going to get hurt – the clue's in the description 'venomous snakes'. Who would do something that stupid?" Akane demanded. "Surely there aren't people that stupid?"

"Heheh," Genma laughed nervously. "Let's focus on our assessment of the dojo, shall we?"

* * *

><p>Shampoo looked up at Ranma as he walked into the Tendo home. He wore a frustrated look on his face.<p>

"Something wrong?"

"I was practicing with Pops and he got all fussy," the pigtailed youth answered. "I should be used to it by now, but you know how he gets. Anyway, what are you up to?"

"Grammar practice," the Amazon replied. "Japanese is a tricky language, but at least it standardised. Many different dialects in China; can cause confusion. Not to mention simplified and traditional characters. "

There wasn't much Ranma felt he could say or do in response to that observation, and so just smiled politely.

"What do you think of Akane?" Shampoo asked, changing the subject.

"I can't really know her after a day, but she seems alright. Her sister Nabiki is weird, though."

"Yeah, she think you some kind of monster. What about other sister, Kasumi?"

"She's always come across as nice, but like I said, I've known them for a day. She could be hiding some sort of terrible secret, for all we know."

The Amazon picked up on the humour in Ranma's voice. "Maybe she psycho killer?"

"Or super-villain?"

"We meet again, Mr. Bond," Shampoo said before bursting out into laughter.

Ranma joined in with the laughter before adding, "No, Mr. Bond, I expect you die."

Kasumi and Nabiki entered the room, the older sister intent on enquiring about numbers for tea, while the younger wanted to see what Ranma and Shampoo were laughing about.

The mercenary sister glared suspiciously at Ranma. "What are you so happy about?"

The pigtailed martial artist didn't take kindly to Nabiki's aggressive attitude and answered defensively, "Private joke."

"I'll make us all some tea," Kasumi said, hoping to defuse the situation.

"Yes, tea would be nice," Shampoo agreed. She looked at Ranma. "Unless…"

"Mind control through the tea! What fiendish plan!" Ranma declared theatrically, causing the Chinese girl to burst out laughing. He looked at the quizzical looks on the Tendo sisters' faces and explained his joke. "Shampoo asked me what I thought about you, and I said that since I've only known you for a day, I couldn't really get a handle on things.

"I mentioned that Kasumi could be hiding some sort of secret, and we decided that she's a super-villain."

"A super-villain?" Nabiki asked incredulously.

"Oh yeah, the whole living in a hollowed out volcano with a private army type thing," the part-time bear replied, causing Kasumi to blush at the attention.

"Careful," Shampoo said, "You don't want her to make an example of you to the others."

"Example?" the homemaker asked in confusion.

"You know when people like Blofeld say things like 'you have failed me for the last time' before they drop them into a shark tank," Ranma clarified, enabling Kasumi to finally cotton onto the joke

"Alas, I couldn't get the parts for a shark tank, so I had to make do with a koi pond," the 'super-villain' sighed theatrically. "Koi aren't very good at instilling terror in people. And don't get me started on how long it takes for them eat a man's body…"

Nabiki wasn't amused, however, and she left for her room.

"What's up with her?" Shampoo asked. "She act like Ranma only five seconds from killing us all."

"I don't know what to say," Kasumi said apologetically. "I can understand why she would be afraid of Ranma when he's a bear, but that doesn't mean she should be so rude."

"I'm just going to ignore her when she's like that," Ranma decided. "It'll be easier that way."

Shampoo nodded in agreement. "It for the best."

"Now, what about that tea?" the homemaker asked.

* * *

><p>Akane returned from her training session to see Ranma, Kasumi and Shampoo drinking tea and eating snacks.<p>

"Where's Nabiki? She'd be annoyed that she's missing out on tea and snacks."

"She decided that she didn't like being around me, so went off in a huff," Ranma answered.

"Odd," Akane mused. "I mean, she tolerates being around Kuno."

"Who?" Shampoo asked.

"He interrupted our match earlier," the Tendo heir explained.

"Wait, does that mean I'm worse to be around than that idiot?" the pigtailed martial artist asked.

"Well, he is rich," Akane added. "And Nabiki does love money."

"He seemed to be under the impression that you and he were romantically involved, Akane," Kasumi said. "You never mentioned anything like that before."

"I'm not dating that idiot!" Akane insisted.

"Ok, but why would he think he's got some say in who you date?" asked Ranma. "Last time I checked, you don't get to order people around like that."

"Well, it started at school. He made a declaration that if you wanted to ask me out on date, you had to beat me in a fight."

"That's one of the most stupid things I've ever heard," the pigtailed young man decided. "And I went to the cursed pools of Jusenkyo to train."

"But he's rich, popular and captain of the kendo team, so people do what he says," Akane countered.

"Doesn't make it any less stupid," Shampoo opined. "Kuno as bad as Mousse."

"I think you're right there, Shampoo."

"Who's 'Mousse'?"

"Mousse is boy from village. Always annoy me from when we were little. Made worse because he can't see properly and always confuse others for me."

"Heh," Akane smiled. "I guess that we've got more in common than I first thought: we're both martial artists who are being hassled by idiots."

* * *

><p>To be continued…<p>

Pre-read by Chi Vayne and previewed on various intertubes.

Until the next time.


	4. Part 4

Exit, Pursued by a Bear

By Lord Raa

* * *

><p>Disclaim-me-do: Entropy always increases.<p>

* * *

><p>Part 4<p>

* * *

><p>At dinner, Soun cleared his throat. When he had everyone's attention, he made an announcement.<p>

"I wanted to take this opportunity to say that Ranma will be attending Furinkan with Akane and Nabiki," the moustachioed man said with a smile on his face.

"What? You mean I have to go to school with that monster?" the middle Tendo sister demanded, pointing angrily at Ranma.

"Monster?" the part-time bear repeated, clearly upset by Nabiki's tone.

"You turn into a bear! What else am I supposed to call you?" Nabiki asked.

"You could call him 'Ranma', you know, his name," Shampoo replied, glaring angrily at Nabiki.

"He's dangerous and I don't want him in the house!"

Akane might not have liked the idea of a boy staying in the house, but she couldn't help but feel that her sister was being a bit unreasonable.

"Then he'll live in the dojo," Soun replied, hoping to sound like he'd come up with a wise solution to the problem.

"What about bathing?" Ranma asked, rightly feeling put out by the apparent restrictions being put on him.

"They hose down animals at the zoo, don't they?" the mercenary girl sniped.

"Cold water comes out of hoses. Cold water turns Ranma into a bear," Shampoo countered, pointing out the idiocy of Nabiki's irrational suggestion.

"Err… yeah," Akane nodded. "You say you're scared of bears, but you want to keep Ranma as a bear? That makes no sense."

"What makes no sense is that you suddenly changed your tune and now you want a boy to stay with us," Nabiki shot back, becoming flustered at the situation. "You love Ranma or something?"

Soun blinked, having watched the conversation bounce back and forth between the girls at the table. "Wait, what? Akane, are you willing to get married to Ranma now?"

"She seems to be sticking up for him now…" the middle sister smirked as she left the table.

"Hey!" the Tendo heir shouted. "Nobody said anything about getting married to Ranma!"

"Speak for yourself," Shampoo replied. "I'm quite happy to get married to Ranma."

"Well, yes, we know that, Shampoo," Genma said, smiling patronisingly.

Kasumi finished eating and placed her bowl and chopsticks down on the table. "I've just had a thought."

"Oh?" Ranma asked, curious as to what Kasumi could be thinking.

"Well, what if we adopted Shampoo into the Tendo family? She could then marry Ranma without any problems."

"But what about the dojo?" Soun asked.

"Hmm, I hadn't thought about that," the homemaker admitted. "But why are you so concerned about the dojo now? You didn't seem this bothered last month."

"Well… the thing is…" the moustachioed man stalled as he tried to word his response as something other than 'it's to avoid a massive tax bill'. He looked towards his old training partner for help.

Genma nodded in acknowledgment before responding. "Is it so wrong for a man to want to see his children get the best out of life? To be able to help them out with his years of experience should they need it? What parent wouldn't want to see his children make a success of the family business?"

"You make a compelling argument, Pops," Ranma said, theatrically wiping away an imaginary tear. "But you're still hiding something from us. How can we agree to such a proposal without the proper risk analysis?"

"Wha-?" the balding man was cut off by the splash of cold water hitting him in the face.

"What about the risk analysis?" the part time bear repeated. "You want us to take over the dojo, but you won't tell us why it's suddenly so urgent. Mr. Tendo didn't care about it a month ago, yet when I arrive, suddenly it's the most important thing in the world. Why? Are people going to come looking to claim the dojo as their own?"

"Or worse, us?" Akane asked, recalling how the engagement with Ranma had surprised her and her sisters.

"You're right, Ranma," Genma nodded as his cursed form considered the implications of threats of force. "Tendo-kun, we must look at the risks of forcing one of your daughters to marry Ranma just to avoid the inheritance tax on the home and dojo."

"Yes, you look at those risks," Ranma said as Soun winced at his friend's words. "We'll help clear the table."

* * *

><p>After the table was cleared, Ranma decided that is was time for his evening practice in the dojo. Shampoo had opted to join him, taking the opportunity to join in the balance practice. It wasn't that the Tendos had made her feel unwelcome, but there was something about the sisters that gave her pause.<p>

Nabiki's random outbursts and rants about how Ranma was a monster and a danger to everyone were getting to be tiresome.

Akane didn't hate Ranma or at least, she tolerated him and his curse. Not that it meant that the youngest Tendo was enthusiastic about the prospect of being engaged to him, but Shampoo suspected that Akane's reluctance was more to do with her father's surprise announcement.

The one who seemed to be warmest towards Ranma was the eldest, Kasumi. Though they had only been at the Tendo home for a mere day, it was clear that it was Kasumi that looked after things. So perhaps she was just being a good host?

Shampoo took a break from standing on a thin strip of wood that had been raised off the floor, as she looked around she spotted Kasumi standing in the doorway with a tray of teacups.

The brunette was staring at the way Ranma had been doing one-handed push-ups in the handstand position.

The Amazon also noticed that Kasumi's face seemed a bit redder than normal.

"Is everything alright?"

"I... yes, it's just the steam from the tea," the homemaker insisted weakly. "I thought that you might like some refreshment."

"Thank you," Ranma said, flipping himself onto his feet. He approached Kasumi and bowed politely before taking the cup nearest to him. "Wait a minute, is this tea...?"

Shampoo froze, holding her cup centimetres from her lips. She looked questioningly at the object of her affection. "What about the tea?"

Kasumi's expression turned to one of horror at the implication that it was anything less than her usual standard. After a moment, the mischievous twinkle in the part-time bear's eyes made her realise that Ranma was making a reference to a joke he made earlier.

"Please, Mr. Saotome," the brunette said, trying to calm her flustered voice. "If I wanted you out of the way, do you really think we would be standing here talking?"

Ranma let out a chuckle. "I guess not, Kasumi Tendo. Or should I say 'Mistress Terror'?"

"Oh-ho-ho-ho," Kasumi laughed daintily in reply. "Just because you know my codename, do not think that you know all of my plans. Now, continue your practice. I would hate for your inevitable demise to be boring."

"Very well, Mistress Terror. Come on Shampoo, it's time to put on a display that will impress our host here."

Shampoo nodded as she handed her teacup back to Kasumi.

The two martial artists worked through a complicated pattern of kicks and punches against invisible enemies as Kasumi looked on.

The homemaker seemed to approve of the skill that was on display. Or at least, she seemed to approve of the way Ranma's musculature flexed as he twisted and turned during his battle against imaginary fighters.

* * *

><p>In her room, Nabiki was angrily plotting to be rid of the troublesome Saotomes. Shampoo wasn't so bad, though she seemed a little unsophisticated compared to her peers.<p>

'Maybe she's from a small village in the middle of nowhere?' the short-haired Tendo mused. 'Not that it matters. If I can get rid of Ranma, she'll follow him.'

Given the nature of the Jusenkyo curse, it was unlikely that she could guarantee that Ranma would be in his bear form long enough for anyone to take him seriously as a threat. She knew that the moment she called for help, Ranma would get some hot water and turn back into his normal body, making her look foolish or crazy.

No, Ranma's curse would require independent verification from a reliable source.

'Perhaps Doctor Tofu could be of help?'

* * *

><p>Soun and Genma sat opposite each other at the go board.<p>

"Saotome-kun, this is a troubling situation," the long haired man said solemnly.

"I know, Tendo-kun. I can understand your desire to ensure the Tendo family legacy." The portly man placed a piece on the board. "I believe that move wins me the game."

"How did you?" Soun asked, unsure of how he'd managed to lose the game so rapidly. He shook his head in an attempt to focus on the issue at hand. "Yes, we need to explain to our children the importance of this union."

Genma closed his eyes as he pondered the situation. "Nabiki has already made it clear that she wants nothing to do with Ranma. But all is not lost since you have two other daughters. However..."

"What do you mean 'however'?"

"It will take some time to train Akane to the point where she can defeat Shampoo in combat."

"Yes, I fear that I might have been too soft when it comes to her training," the widow lamented.

"That said," Genma mused, "the elders in Shampoo's village know that there's more to being a wife than just being able to fight."

"What do you mean, Saotome-kun?"

"Shampoo is here to prove that she's the best candidate for Ranma's hand in marriage. There are two things that are important to in Shampoo's village – martial prowess and the ability to run a home. Akane is the best option for fighting; Kasumi already does the cooking here."

"You mean Kasumi would take part in cooking challenges?" Soun asked. He looked off into the distance and his mouth started to water at the prospect of Kasumi pulling out all the stops with her cooking. "... I think that we must go with this two-pronged plan, Saotome-kun."

"I agree, Tendo-kun. At the very least, it will buy us the time we need to get Akane in a position to challenge Shampoo."

* * *

><p>Akane had just finished reading her magazine. She glanced at her clock and realised that if she wanted to get a good night's sleep before her training session with Genma Saotome, it was time for her to turn in.<p>

"I wonder if Saotome-san and Daddy always had to get up this early when they were training?" she pondered aloud as she set her alarm for 5:30.

It had been a while since Akane had gotten up that early herself, and that was for a school trip. As she prepared her gi and school uniform for the next day she realised that she needed to clean her teeth.

Leaving her room, she was surprised to see Nabiki skulking around.

"Is something wrong, Nabiki?"

"I'm just making sure Ranma isn't around here."

"By pretending to be a burglar?"

"No," the short-haired Tendo replied, clearly infuriated by her sister's inability to see the real threat. "I have to keep an eye out for him."

"And you can't do this by walking around normally?"

"No!" Nabiki replied. "Because he's a bear! He'll try to eat me if I disturb him!"

Akane let out a sigh. There were good reasons to not want Ranma in the house – he was a boy; their fathers wanted them to get married, so who knew what kind of stunts would be pulled. But the way Nabiki was acting, you'd think Ranma was a demon-bear unleashed from the deepest pits of Hell.

Sure, turning into a bear when splashed with cold water was weird, but if you were polite to Ranma, he was polite back. It was only when you started to antagonise him that he went out of his way to be mean.

"Alright, Nabiki, continue to sneak around like a burglar. I've got to brush my teeth and go to bed. Some of us have to get up at 5:30."

The middle sister remembered why Akane and her father were going to be up at that ungodly hour and shuddered. "Why would you want to be up at 5:30 in the morning when you could be asleep in a nice warm bed?"

"Because if you want to get better at something, you have to make sacrifices. If I don't put in the effort, I can't improve as a martial artist."

* * *

><p>Kasumi was surprised to see her father approach her just as she was going to turn in.<p>

"Ah, Kasumi, there's something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Oh, what's that, Father?"

"Well, it's about the legacy of the Tendo dojo," the moustachioed man said. It took most of his strength to maintain his facade of wisdom and authority.

Kasumi nodded. She knew that the dojo meant a great deal to her father, even though he had no current paying students. "What can I do to help, Father?"

"Well, it's about Shampoo and her challenge..."

"I can't interfere with a matter of honour, Father, it wouldn't be right," the homemaker insisted sternly.

"I would never dream of asking you to do anything improper, Kasumi," Soun replied, aghast at the implication of skulduggery.

"Then what did you mean?"

"I... Well, there's more to running a dojo than just being a skilled martial artist. While Akane is a skilled martial artist..."

Kasumi nodded, knowing full well what her father was alluding to. It was in Akane's nature to try hard in everything she did. Unfortunately, this enthusiasm often got the better of her and she didn't always pay attention to what she was doing and her cooking was... not good, to put it politely.

"So you want me to challenge Shampoo to the domestic aspects?"

"Yes," the long-haired man nodded happily. "It would also give us a chance to step up Akane's training."

Kasumi nodded again, the match earlier had shown just how badly outclassed Akane had been by Shampoo. And Ranma had been even more impressive, even as a bear.

* * *

><p>It was just turning light when Akane's alarm clock went off. She had deliberately set it a few minutes before 5:30 just so she wouldn't be taken completely unaware by her father and Genma's wake up call.<p>

Her bed was warm, much warmer than her room. In fact, it was just cosy enough to make the Tendo heir understand why Nabiki hated mornings so much.

"Do I really have to get up?" she asked herself rhetorically. "Well, you really should if you want to be ready for your training."

After the deep breaths to steel herself failed to give her the motivation necessary to get out of bed, a thought occurred to Akane.

"Mister Saotome seems like the sort of teacher who would throw a bucket of water over your head to wake you up."

The thought that Nabiki might see a wet patch on the bed and think that it was an accident rather than a harsh wake-up call was enough to get Akane out of bed and into her gi.

She had just finished tying the belt when her father knocked on the door.

"Akane, are you awake?"

"I'm up, Daddy. I'll be right down."

"I'll see you in the dojo," the widower said. His voice was tired, but filled with pride at the thought that his daughter was taking her martial arts seriously.

* * *

><p>Soun wasn't surprised to hear Ranma snoring in the dojo, given that the boy's father practically rattled the windows with his own breathing. However, it was the amplification factor of Ranma's ursine form that had caught him unawares.<p>

"Ranma, it's time to get up," he said, fighting off a shiver in the chilly training room. He was soon joined by Genma and Akane. "Saotome-kun, I thought Ranma took his training seriously."

"Don't worry about the boy, Tendo-kun," Genma said as he started to stretch. "He'll wake up soon enough."

The moustachioed man was sceptical, but he could certainly see the wisdom in not trying to shake a bear awake. "They say to let sleeping dogs lie, but I'm sure that it also applies to bears."

"Quite," Akane said as she started her warm up exercises.

* * *

><p>About five minutes later, the sounds and smell of sweat were strong enough to wake Ranma up. He slowly lifted his head and opened up one eye to see what all the commotion was about.<p>

'They're training Akane? Oh yeah, they said that they were going to do that.'

Ranma let out a loud yawn, causing everyone to flinch in fear. When he noticed everyone's reaction, the bear rolled his eyes and shook his head.

Standing on his hind legs, Ranma stretched out his arms. He beckoned his father to start sparring with him.

Genma realised that this would be a good lesson for Akane to watch and fell into a standard Anything Goes stance.

"In your own time, Ranma."

Rushing forward with a shoulder charge, the bear surprised everyone with his speed. It was only years of experience that allowed Genma to dodge the attack.

But it was the follow-up punch to solar plexus made a normally immovable object fly backwards like a bad arcade fighting game.

Ranma turned to the Tendos and gave them a questioning look.

"No-no-no-no-no!" Akane insisted, backing away from the bear. "We don't want to fight you!"

The bear nodded its approval, glad that the need for violence was now over. He returned to his corner and went back to sleep.

Akane turned to her father. "What now?"

"I don't know," the moustachioed man admitted. He splashed some of his cold water onto the stunned form of Genma and asked him what he thought was the best course of action.

The balding man shook his head. "I think that we were too ambitious with our intensive training plan. After all, Tendo-kun, you and your daughter are not used to strenuous physical exercise this early in the morning. Perhaps we would be better off starting with a lengthy run this morning?"

"Yes, I think we can get a few kilometres in before breakfast," Soun nodded in approval. "And that way, we don't risk disturbing the others."

Everyone cast a glance towards the sleeping bear and decided that discretion was the better part of valour before quietly exiting the dojo.

* * *

><p>A short while later, Shampoo entered the dojo with a flask of hot water.<p>

"Ranma?"

She was greeted by the sight of Ranma sleeping in the corner of the dojo. She was tempted to stroke the bear's soft looking black fur, but managed to stop herself before tempting fate.

She knew that the part-time bear had suffered from some unspecified psychological trauma that occasionally caused night terrors. When surprised, he was prone to lashing out in defence.

Genma had sustained several nasty looking wound after such an event.

Though what had surprised Shampoo when that had happened, was that she'd felt protected by Ranma, despite being close enough to end up as his next meal.

The purple-haired girl poured some of the hot water over Ranma's head, turning him from a large, black and white bear to a shirtless, muscular young man.

Involuntarily, Shampoo found herself licking her lips. "Ranma..."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm getting up now, Shampoo," Ranma said, shaking some of the water out of his hair.

"Where is everyone?"

"Pops, Akane and Mr. Tendo were here earlier, but they must have left after I went back to sleep. Anyway, what's the plan for today's training?"

The Amazon was proud of the fact that she managed to keep her first response of 'how about we wrestle?' to herself. "Nothing too physical, we've got our first day of school later."

"Oh man, it just gets worse for me today. First, Pops wakes me up and now, I've got to go to school. At this rate, I'll probably end up having to sit in my classes as a bear," Ranma sighed. "Then they'll send me outside in the halls for not being able to answer any questions."

"What if I could teach you a way to communicate as a bear?" Shampoo hinted.

"You can do that?" the part-time bear asked, intrigued by the advantage this would give him. 'Being able to tell people what's wrong without them being scared would be great!'

"I can, but it might take a while."

"What does it involve?"

"Signs. So you might need to practice your handwriting and spelling."

"Signs? I think I can write as a bear, but where am I going to get a sign from? Plus, I'll be forever cleaning it and starting again."

Shampoo smirked as she pulled out a practice sword from nowhere. "You're not seeing the big picture, Ranma."

Ranma's eyes widened. If he was reading this right, Shampoo would teach him the ability to pull items out of thin air. And even if he did find a cure for being a bear half the time, he'd certainly always be able to find a use for such a technique.

"Of course, I can't be expected to reveal such a time-honoured technique for nothing," Shampoo teased. "What would it be worth to you?"

The cursed martial artist rubbed his chin. "I... Are you doing anything this weekend? I thought that it might be nice to go out on a date..."

'Finally!' the Amazon mentally cheered. 'He's getting it!' "Well, I think that I can find some free time this weekend. But only if that's a concrete offer!"

"It's a promise, Shampoo. I'll take you out this weekend," Ranma said, his voice filled with sincerity.

"Well, in that case, here's what you need to do," Shampoo said.

* * *

><p>Genma and Akane looked over their shoulders to see that Soun was lagging behind.<p>

"What's up, Tendo-kun? Do you need us to take you to a doctor?"

Soun bristled at his training partner's comment, taking it to be one of their master's sarcastic training methods.

"I'll finish this run!" the long-haired man shot back.

Akane looked concerned for her father's wellbeing. "Daddy, are you sure about this? We can take a break if you need to."

It was then that Soun realised that Genma was still in his cursed form and it wasn't sarcasm, but genuine concern. "I... I think we should all take a water break. No sense in dehydrating ourselves."

The trio slowed down to a halt and started to drink their water.

"How far have we run?" Akane asked between gulps of water.

"About eight kilometres," Genma answered. Despite his bulk, he was the least winded of the three. "It took us longer than planned, but if we head back now, we can make it in time for breakfast and a shower before we start the next phase."

"Next phase?" Soun asked.

"What about school?" Akane asked.

"Well, obviously you'll be going to school with Ranma and Shampoo, Akane," the balding man replied. "As for the next phase of the training, well, Tendo-kun, if you hope to be a good example to your daughter, you'll need to pick up the pace in your training."

"But my training days are over..." the moustachioed man protested weakly.

"I thought that your dreams of securing the legacy of the Tendo Dojo were made of sterner stuff, Tendo-kun," Genma said, shaking his head sadly. "If you can't train your daughter, then why would anyone want to be trained by your daughter?"

"..." Akane felt conflicted. Her father had been insulted, but Mr. Saotome had a good point.

"Plus, Akane needs to make sure that she can beat Shampoo in the rematch, what better motivation for that than to see her father go through the same hardships?"

"... Saotome-kun, I apologise. I had forgotten that you could be so wise, this would secure the legacy of the dojo and strengthen the bond between father and daughter," Soun replied, his eyes filling with manly tears. "I will train with you, Akane and we will succeed in securing our legacy!"

Akane blinked. 'Wow, Mr Saotome's good...' "Yes, Daddy, we'll do this together!"

"Excellent. But first, we need to get back in time for breakfast."

* * *

><p>At the breakfast table, there was a multitude of different feelings for the different diners.<p>

Soun and Akane were tired, but enthused about the idea of bonding with over training.

Ranma was happy that he'd learned something new that would make things easier for him at school.

Shampoo was happy that she'd been able to get Ranma to promise a date with her that weekend. 'Ranma doesn't make many promises, but those he does, he sweats blood to keep.'

Nabiki was plotting. She'd made her feelings known about the presence of Ranma and his scary alter-ego, but that didn't seem to convince the others in her family. No, she would require outside help for this task.

Kasumi was feeling slightly more appreciated by people, thanks to Ranma and Shampoo's interactions with her. Sure, everyone was polite to Kasumi Tendo, but she needed something more than polite conversation about vegetables and laundry detergent.

The running joke that Kasumi was actually a super-villain allowed her a small measure of escapism that made her daily grind bearable.

And Genma was enjoying the food. He liked food.

* * *

><p>To be continued...<p>

Yes, I'm still alive.

Pre-read by Chi Vayne and previewed on The Fanfiction Forum dot net. I think you can figure out what you need to do to get there. You might even see fragments of other ideas that I've had. Plus you can point out any errors that got missed in this chapter.

Which brings me on to the next point: I'd apologise for not updating sooner, but this only really came out the other day. Plus I'm lazy.

I've had a challenging couple of years, the details of which are incredibly boring, but I have been writing. Slowly, but there has still been some writing. Just not necessarily for the stories that you want to see continued.

Yes, I've had several ideas that haven't really been ready for public consumption, but that's one of the joys of being part of a fanfiction community - you can enjoy previews and give corrections, suggestions and even inspire new stories.

So sign up and see new things. Or don't. I'm not the boss of you, I'm just some idiot with a keyboard and internet connection.


	5. Part 5

Exit, Pursued by a Bear

By Lord Raa

* * *

><p>Disclaim-me-do: Real life rarely fails to disappoint.<p>

* * *

><p>Part 5<p>

* * *

><p>Nabiki had left ahead of Akane, Ranma and Shampoo, claiming to need to attend to some unspecified business.<p>

Akane shrugged and apologised for her sister. "She's not normally that rude."

"If she doesn't want to be around Ranma, that's her loss," Shampoo replied. While Nabiki hadn't been as rude to her as she'd been towards Ranma, she didn't like the middle sister for her irrational hatred of the part-time bear.

Kasumi nodded in agreement with Shampoo as she handed out lunches to everyone. "Perhaps she just needs to talk to her friends about Father's plan?"

"Maybe," Ranma shrugged. "She seems like the sort of person who'll do what she wants, regardless of what we say to her. It'll probably be easier if we leave her alone."

"That's a mature attitude to take, Ranma-kun," Kasumi smiled in approval.

"Well, not all of us have experience with 'enhanced techniques for convincing people,'" the part-time bear winked playfully.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," the homemaker said, though the smile on her lips told another story.

"What am I missing here?" Akane asked confused about the banter being exchanged.

"We think that Kasumi is a super-villain," Shampoo explained. "Isn't that right, Mistress Terror?"

"You might very well think that; I couldn't possibly comment," Kasumi retorted, struggling to keep a sincere expression on her face.

"A super-villain? Like in a James Bond movie?"

"We're not entirely sure," Ranma answered. "After all, 'Mistress Terror' hasn't issued any demands or manifestoes."

"Kasumi a super-villain called Mistress Terror?" Akane repeated before laughing. "I don't know what's funnier, the fact that you think that Kasumi could be a super-villain or the fact that it's the perfect cover."

"Does that mean you don't want a job as my head of security, Akane?" Kasumi asked, her eyes filled with mirth.

"What are the perks of the job?"

"Excellent catering, health insurance and the chance to punch idiots like Kuno," Ranma smiled.

"In that case, I'm in," Akane laughed. "Come on, we need to get going or we're going to be late for school."

* * *

><p>At Furinkan, Nabiki approached Tatewaki Kuno with a serious look on her face.<p>

"Kuno, I need to talk to you about Akane."

"What about my fierce tigress?" the kendoist asked, interrupting his practice swings.

"There's something you need to know about her. You might remember that there was talk of her being engaged to someone?"

"Yes, I recall someone mentioning something along those lines," Kuno nodded. "Truly an unfortunate piece of news, but I am sure that the heavens will see that this suitor will drop his claim."

Nabiki grit her teeth rather than let out some sarcasm. "Well, it seems that this suitor will be attending Furinkan. He's called Ranma, he's got long black hair and he knows martial arts. If you can defeat him in combat, then Akane will surely see that you're the only person strong enough to protect her."

"Yes, you speak a profound truth, Nabiki Tendo. Is there anything else I should know about this 'Ranma' fellow?"

"He's called Ranma Saotome, you'll recognise him from his arrogant swagger. He thinks he's some kind of martial arts god."

"To compare one's skill to those of the gods themselves is truly arrogant. It is my divine duty to put him in his place," Kuno frowned, completely missing the irony in his words.

The conversation was curtailed by the arrival of Akane, Ranma and Shampoo causing the crowd of boys to form up and begin their twisted courting ritual.

Nabiki took this opportunity to get to her classroom.

* * *

><p>As Ranma, Akane and Shampoo approached the gate to Furinkan, Akane started to look annoyed.<p>

"Something wrong, Akane?" Shampoo asked.

"There's something I forgot to mention about school."

A crowd of boys surged forward out of the gates, all them with strange looks on their faces.

"Akane Tendo, accept my love!"

"Akane Tendo, please go out with me!"

Ranma and Shampoo turned to face each other. "Are they doing what I think they're doing?"

"I think so..."

Then came the violence as Akane defended herself from the horde of horny idiots.

"Shampoo, I don't mean to be mean, but have any of your tribe been to Nerima before?"

"No," Shampoo insisted. "At least, I don't think so."

After Akane quickly dealt with the horde, Kuno dramatically revealed himself.

"Truly such a boorish lot," the kendoist sighed theatrically. "My dear Akane Tendo, I have heard some troubling news."

"What news would that be, Kuno-sempai?" Akane asked, breathing hard after her melee.

"That there is a man who dares to think that he may court you, that he thinks himself worthy of your hand."

"Really? And who would that be?" Ranma asked having walked through the school gate with Shampoo at his side.

"I was talking to Akane Tendo, not you," the kendoist scowled. "Just who do you think you are interrupting a sacred ritual?"

"I'm-"

"Is it now good form to announce oneself? I am a Tatewaki Kuno, also known as the Blue Thunder of Furinkan, rising star of the kendo community."

"Oh yeah, I remember you from yesterday. I'm Ranma Saotome, heir to the Saotome School of Anything Goes."

"Ranma Saotome?" Kuno repeat, his expression turning dark. "I've heard about you."

"Oh?" the pigtailed martial artist asked, curious as to what Kuno had heard about him.

"Yes, I've heard that you're an arrogant fool, who thinks he's an unbeatable martial artist with designs on Akane Tendo."

Akane blinked. "That describes you perfectly, Kuno-sempai."

"But the heavens smile upon my noble self," Kuno insisted.

"Whatever, we've got to register for class. Come on, Shampoo, no point in being late on our first day," Ranma said, dismissing Kuno.

Shampoo and Akane quickly joined Ranma and the trio walked into the main building.

Kuno blinked in surprise. "D-did you just dismiss the Blue Thunder of Furinkan?!"

The kendoist raised his bokken and charged at Ranma, intent on punishing this insolent youth with the wrath of the heavens.

It was Shampoo that knocked Kuno unconscious with a swift roundhouse kick to the jaw. "Go away," she chided.

"Such... fierceness..." Kuno thought before losing consciousness.

Looking down at the scene in the schoolyard, Nabiki frowned. 'I thought Kuno was made of sterner stuff than that...'

* * *

><p>"Class, we've got some new students joining us today," Takamoto-sensei announced, though he sounded like he would bored by an alien spaceship landing in the schoolyard. "Please introduce yourselves."<p>

"I'm Ranma Saotome," Ranma said with a bow. "Heir to the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts."

"I'm Shampoo," the Chinese girl added cheerfully. "I'm an exchange student from China and I also know martial arts."

"Well, you can see where there are empty chairs," the teacher said, somehow managing to keep from yawning contemptuously. "Now, if you can be bothered to take out your textbooks and turn to page 132, we can learn about the dangers of deforestation."

* * *

><p>In her classroom, Nabiki was frantically considering the right words to use to get Kuno to do the decent thing and remove the demon bear from her life.<p>

"Nabiki Tendo, what do you know of that exotic beauty that accompanied your sister this morning?"

'I was planning to use Kuno's lust for Akane as a means to defeat Ranma,' the mercenary Tendo thought, managing to hide a frown. 'However Shampoo does like Ranma...' "Well, for a price I could find out some information for you."

"Of course, I cannot expect you to work for nothing, Nabiki Tendo," Kuno replied, thinking he was sounding gracious, but as ever, his words sounded pompous. "How much would be an appropriate level of compensation?"

"Hmm... five thousand yen, would be a good place to start, I think."

Kuno's wallet appeared and flew open, revealing several crisp banknotes. "Is there any particular denomination that you'd prefer, Nabiki Tendo?"

"Thousand yen notes, please, Kuno," Nabiki replied. She held her hand out for the money without batting an eyelid.

The kendoist counted out five one thousand yen notes into Nabiki's palm. "Now, what can you tell me about this exotic huntress?"

"... Well, she's called Shampoo. She's from China and she's..." Nabiki paused as she finalised her wording. "She's been cursed. Cursed in that there's this demonic bear that follows her around. It's this bear that you'll have to defeat if you want to date Shampoo."

"This bear... was it the one at your house yesterday?"

"That's the one, Kuno. Now, you know that it's not a normal bear. No bear can move like that, hell, not even a man in a bear-suit can move like that."

"Yes," Tatewaki nodded. "Truly, it is a formidable opponent. But still, the heavens smile upon the righteous and that shall grant me the means to defeat this demon bear."

Nabiki smiled. 'Yes, Kuno, you're finally being of some use.'

"However," Kuno said, speaking up and interrupting Nabiki's self-congratulatory thoughts. "What of that 'Saotome' fellow that was with your sister and Shampoo?"

"... That's Ranma," the mercenary girl answered. "He's another thorn in your side. His father and mine used to be training partners and he's staying with us."

"WHAT? He's staying under the same roof as Akane? I cannot allow such impropriety!" the delusional wannabe samurai declared, jumping to his feet.

"Kuno, it gets worse."

"What?"

"Our fathers wish to 'unite the schools of Anything Goes' through marriage..." Nabiki added, conveniently overlooking the fact that Ranma and Akane had pretty much refused to get engaged.

"That scoundrel!" Kuno fumed, veins on his forehead were becoming visible.

"Of course, if you were to defeat Ranma, then you'd have a claim to marry Akane..." Nabiki hinted. 'That should sort things out.'

"Yes," the kendoist nodded, his excitement rising. "Defeat the demon bear and I would have the affection of the Huntress, Shampoo. Defeat Ranma and Akane would be free to date me... I must act now!"

Before anyone could say or do anything, Kuno dashed to the door to find Ranma and unleash the justice of the heavens.

'That was some good thinking on my part...' the mercenary girl thought with a smile as she pocketed the money Kuno had given her.

* * *

><p>The teacher in Akane's class was in the middle of talking about soil erosion being one of the consequences of deforestation when Kuno burst into the room.<p>

"Ranma Saotome, I shall defeat you and claim the hand of Akane Tendo!" the blowhard declared.

"Wait, what?" the teacher asked in confusion. "Ranma Saotome, do you know what Kuno is talking about?"

"No, not really," the pigtailed martial artist replied honestly. "I've been in town for like three days. I don't even know the way from here to the Tendo dojo."

"Saotome is the man who is standing in the way between the noble beauty that is Akane Tendo and my righteous self," Kuno half explained. "And what would you know of the Tendo dojo?"

"I'm staying in the dojo. Literally," Ranma answered truthfully.

"You sleep under the same roof as Akane Tendo?"

"No, I have to sleep in the dojo. Not the house, the dojo."

"It's true," Shampoo nodded.

"My glorious Warrior Princess," Kuno smiled, momentarily distracted by the Amazon's form-fitting clothing. "May I ask as to how you would know what the sleeping arrangements of that uncouth wretch are?"

"I'm also staying with the Tendos."

"Under the same roof as Akane?" the kendoist murmured, his mouth starting to water. "Does that mean that there vigorous training sessions? Followed by skinship in the bath afterwards?"

Ranma frowned when he heard the lecherous intent in Kuno's voice. "What makes you think that either Akane or Shampoo would be interested in you?"

"Clearly you are as blind as you are ill-mannered, Saotome," Kuno replied scornfully. "Can you not tell from my manly profile that I'm of good noble lineage? My skills with the sword are unmatched at Furinkan."

"And?"

"What do you mean, 'and!?'" the delusional swordsman demanded.

"And what of your alleged skills with the sword and your family line? Is that supposed to impress us? Well-bred isn't too far from inbred, you know."

The gazes of the students turned to Ranma and Kuno in turn as they argued their point. It was rare that anyone had the guts to stand up to Kuno for very long, but Ranma looked like he didn't care for the pompous windbag.

What made him even more interesting to the girls in the class was that he wasn't fawning over Akane, like so many of the other boys in the school.

"How dare you!" Kuno fumed. "You will taste the justice of the heavens!"

"Probably, but not today," Ranma smirked as he finally rose from his seat. "With sensei's permission, we'll do this outside."

"Please, it'll keep the disruption to a minimum," the teacher replied. 'Yet another martial artist... Can't they get real jobs?'

Kuno watched his newly acquired nemesis walk to the hallway and open the window.

"I see that you'd rather plummet to your death than face the justice of the heavens."

"No, it's just the quickest way down. Or are you so feeble that you have to take the stairs?" the pigtailed martial artist mocked. "Best I find out now how I easy I need to go on you."

That was the final straw. The red mist descended and Kuno charged at Ranma, intent on giving this insolent youth a good thrashing.

The class blinked in surprise as Ranma grabbed hold of the kendoist and jumped out of the window with him.

As they rushed to the window, they saw that the combatants were heading towards the outdoor pool.

"At least they're going to land in the pool..."

"Pool?" Ranma asked just as he hit the water.

The students gasped in surprise when they saw that Ranma had disappeared and that a large black bear had taken his place.

"W-what is that?!"

"How?"

"It's a long story," Akane winced. She turned to see that Shampoo had already left to get to the pool.

"Well, aren't you going to tell us what it is?" the teacher asked.

"Well, I don't really know all the details, Sensei. And I don't want to start any rumours just because Ranma didn't tell me something about his curse."

"Curse?"

"Like I said, it's a long story," the Tendo heir said apologetically.

* * *

><p>Even though Shampoo had rushed to the pool, by the time she got there, Ranma had dragged himself and Kuno, albeit reluctantly, out of the water<p>

"Ranma?"

The bear nodded before holding his front paws up to keep Shampoo away for a moment. He shook the excess water from his fur.

After about a minute of this, Ranma seemed happy enough to let Shampoo approach him.

"You didn't know there was a pool there, did you?"

Ranma shook his head.

"This is chance to practice your signs, remember."

The bear bowed his head, almost as an apology for being so forgetful.

'¬No, I didn't know there was a pool here.¬' The sign was flipped around. '¬Do you have any hot water with you?¬'

"Yes, here you go," the purple-haired girl smiled as she pulled out a flask and emptied it on Ranma's head. "Better?"

"Yes. Well, aside from the fact that I don't know where my shirts keep going, but yeah, I'm feeling better now. Thank you, Shampoo."

Their moment was ruined by the groans of Kuno as he regained what passed for his senses.

"What happened?"

"You fell in the pool, Kino-sempai," Shampoo embellished.

"My name is Kuno."

"Sorry, we were only just introduced," the Amazon shrugged.

"Shampoo, do you have a towel handy?" Ranma asked.

"Yes, let me help you."

Kuno frowned. How could this odious young man have won the heart of this buxom warrior princess? Did she not recognise that Ranma was beneath her status and that he, the great Blue Thunder of Furinkan was more suited to her?

And did she have to towel off Ranma's chest in such a manner? One would think that they were courting.

"Is there a towel for me, my Warrior Princess?"

"Sorry, no," Shampoo replied, not looking away from Ranma's muscles as she patted them dry.

"But there's one there..."

"Doesn't mean it's for you, Kuno," Ranma smirked.

Oh how that smirk was beginning to annoy Kuno. "Wait a minute, we didn't fall out of the window, you threw us out!"

"Only because it was the quickest way to get outside, Kuno."

"The heavens will have their justice!" the kendoist declared as he jumped to his feet. "Have at you!"

Ranma rolled his eyes and snap-kicked Kuno in the chin, knocking back into the pool.

"Shampoo, I think we're going to have to go back to class. I think we have to answer a couple of questions."

"But I don't want to," the Amazon pouted. She was quite happy to spend time with the shirtless Ranma in the sunshine.

"We'll get into trouble if we skip school, Shampoo. I don't want us to get grounded. I promised you a date, didn't I?"

"I hadn't thought about that," Shampoo conceded. "Let's go back to class."

* * *

><p>Back in his classroom, Ranma was not entirely surprised by the barrage of questions directed at him.<p>

"I didn't think it was place to tell them," Akane told him. "Plus I didn't want to tell them in case I got something wrong."

"Thank you," Ranma smiled. "Right then. Where do you want me to begin?"

"What was with that bear?"

"That's my curse."

"Why did it appear when you hit the water?"

"It's a magical curse from a place called Jusenkyo. Cold water activates it, hot water changes me back. Until the next time I get splashed. Next question?"

"Does it hurt?"

"No."

"Where's your shirt? Did it rip when you changed into a bear?"

"I don't know what happens to my shirt. If I'm wearing one when I change, it disappears by the time I change back. It's annoying; it seems I go through shirts like tissues."

"You lost your shirt, but why not your trousers? And you've got your shoes on, too. How does that work?"

"Hey, it's a magical shape-changing curse, not some perverted 'let's get everyone naked' curse!"

Shampoo nodded. "It's strange, but it's a magical curse. At Jusenkyo, there's a spring of drowned octopus. Jusenkyo is at least two week's hike from the sea."

"Anything else?" Ranma asked, hoping that the bulk of the questions had been answered.

"What's that about you and Shampoo staying at Akane's?"

"My father and Akane's father used to be training partners and we're staying as their guests," the pigtailed youth answered diplomatically. Yes, he omitted the pledge to unite the schools, but they didn't need to know about that.

Hell, it wasn't even certain that they were going to be united – Akane still needed to defeat Shampoo in the rematch.

"What about Shampoo? Why is she with you? Is she your girlfriend?"

"Yes," the Amazon answered reflexively.

Ranma frowned, but was forced to let it slide. Kuno had returned to gain his vengeance.

* * *

><p>To be continued...<p>

Pre-read by Chi Vayne and previewed on The Fanfiction Forum.

Yes, two updates for the same Ranma story in a year. You are unlucky.

It's entirely conceivable that there could be another update for this nonsense before the end of the decade, but I make no guarantees.


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